Usually everyone who has a dog either calls him rover or some such name. I called mine 'Sex'. Well sex is a very embarrassing name.

One day I took sex for a walk and he ran away from me. I spent hours looking for that dog. A policeman came along and asked

what I was doing in an alley at 4am in the morning. I said I'm looking for sex. My case comes up next Tuesday.

One day I went to the town hall to get a dog license for sex. The clerk asked me what I wanted. I told him

I wanted a license for sex. He said he would like to have one too.When I said 'but this is a dog', He said

he didn't care what she looked like. Then I said 'You don't understand, I've had sex since a two year old. He replied 'you must

have been a strong boy!

When I decided to get married I told the minister that I wanted to have sex at the wedding. He told me wait

until after the ceremony. I said sex had played a big part in my life and my whole lifestyle revolves around

sex. He said he didn't want to hear about my personal life and would not marry us in his church. I told

him everyone coming to the wedding would enjoy having sex there. The next day we were married by the

justice of the peace. My family is barred from the church.

My wife and I took the dog along with us on the honeymoon. When I checked into the hotel I told the

clerk that I wanted a room for my wife and a special room for sex. The clerk said that every room

in the hotel is for sex. Then I said you don't understand sex keeps me awake at night and the clerk said 'me too'

had sex before I was married', and the judge said 'me too'.

Well, now 1^’ve been thrown into jail, been married, divorced and had more damn trouble with that dog than

I had gambled for. Why, just the other day when I went for my first session with the psychiatrist1

she asked me 'what seems to be the trouble'. I replied 'well, sex has died and left my life. It^’s like losing

a best friend and it's so lonely. The doctor looked at me and said, 'mister, you and I both know that sex isn't mans

best friend so get yourself a dog'

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